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Thread: Relationship advice - opinions needed

  
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    astra 2.0's Avatar
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    Relationship advice - opinions needed

    Hi Everyone......

    Right, on new years eve we had a huge house party amd one of my best mates got very drunk and he and my girl friend got into an argument over something stupid...... he was saying things like "get it out of my face" (refereing to her) and "who is this woman"... blah blah...


    Anyway four months on my girlfriend is refusing to let me talk to my mate or have anything to do with him.

    I know it was just cos everyone had a little too much to drink and it was a petty argument but she has said its either him or me..... if you choose him we will be over!

    I've told her a 1000 times that I didn't agree with what he did but it was a stupid argument which happend 4 months ago now but she will not let it drop.

    Is she being too harsh?
    Silver Lightning Linea Rossa coupe

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    Remind her to close the door behind her as she leaves...

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    Simple answer, yes she is. Everyone has problems with people but your girlfriend making you choose between a friendship and relationship is just selfish.

    Never ditch your friends. We've recently played a bit of a prank on our mate at a house party because he's ditched us/his gf won't let him bother with us. No-one likes a backstabber. Girlfriends come and go, as cheesy as it sounds, friends are for life.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Adam_Astra View Post
    Simple answer, yes she is. Everyone has problems with people but your girlfriend making you choose between a friendship and relationship is just selfish.

    Never ditch your friends. We've recently played a bit of a prank on our mate at a house party because he's ditched us/his gf won't let him bother with us. No-one likes a backstabber. Girlfriends come and go, as cheesy as it sounds, friends are for life.
    Very well said

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    She should never have said to choose between your mate and her, imo that never works.
    If he is a real friend you should choose him over her as good friends are with you forever and sad as it is to say girlfriends can be replaced but friends cant.
    "Sometimes the light at the end of the tunnel, is only the train coming to finish you off"



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    Just speaking from experience Years ago I was with a girl, she wouldn't let me go anywhere (along with other problems), I finished her to make myself happier and to actually see my mates. Life's gone a lot better since.
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    My gf took an instant disliking to my BEST friend almost as soon as she met him.

    He's a good guy too but likes the ladies. lol Think she thought he'd lead me astray.

    I basically told her he'd been my mate for 14 years and she wouldn't win if she tried to make me choose.

    She soon came round.

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    I would say that they both have issues - your mate shouldn't have been so disrespectful to your girlfriend, and likewise she should try to rise above it and ignore him. There are similar people that I know, such as a friend of my boyfriend who clearly doesn't like me and can be very obnoxious, continually insults my car (which is hurtful) and things about me in general which I find rude and unnecessary, but to be fair he has known my boyfriend longer than I have. My boyfriend also apologises for his friends' attitude, he doesn't condone it, so I simply ignore the friend's remarks and rise above it, he's not worth wasting the effort on. We'll still socialise but I tend to ignore his remarks as he tries to get to me.

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    resu's Avatar
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    well it depends how you feel about her and how you feel about your mate...

    is she the 1, can you see you and her living together with kids etc
    In my experience you have to hold on to the one you love so tightly because you never know if you'll ever have that with someone ever again.

    now i'm biased because i lost the girl i loved late last year .. it really didnt help that i lost her to a 'best mate' and it only lasted 2 weeks between them ..
    haha

    it only been 5 months i guess but im still cut up about it and in all honesty i cant ever see myself with another girl, i've heard all the "you never know whos round the corner" and "plenty more fish" cliches, but i'm not that kinda guy lol plus i don't get 'out there' to meet new people and when i do get close to people i never know when to make 'the move' so i just let the moment go by so i promise myself 'i'll do it next time'.
    anyways back on topic!


    The only good thing to come out of what happened is taht my other mates all took time out of their lives to pick me up and dust me off.

    thsi is what you have to think about... Is this mate of yours the best mate you could ever ask for or is this girl the girl of your dreams.

    Its tough but you only know what/who makes you happy (and no, BJs shouldn't sway your answer)
    she is being unreasonable and anyone who makes that kind of unfounded ultimatum is unreasonable.

    do you mind if i ask what they argued about?

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    Mates before females chief.

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