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Thread: Can anyone help??

  
  1. #1
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    Smudge67er's Avatar
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    Can anyone help??

    Hi,

    Can anyone help.......I have a real issue getting my astra to go above 17 Bhp!! I've tried everything from fluffy dice, to Leopard skin patterned seats!! I have even tried putting a chav bird in the passenger seat!! I am at a real loss!!

    Please help!!

    Smudge

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    Smudge67er's Avatar
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    Or should I go back to the Nova??

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    Jace's Avatar
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    I think I'd blaim the driver, he's obviously a bit special.
    From the Southeast? Find your next meet here


    The difference between intelligence and stupidity is that intelligence is limited.

    At least I have chicken!

    WellOilBeefHooked

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    Craig's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Smudge67er
    Or should I go back to the Nova??
    or how about the rock you climbed out from under ?
    Ibiza FR CR TDI with 203 BHP

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    320BHP4x4's Avatar
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    Start by getting one of these installed
    http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/Vauxhall-Astra-Corsa-Nova-Resistor-chip-up-to-20-BHP_W0QQitemZ8058433058QQcategoryZ32094QQssPageNam eZWDVWQQrdZ1QQcmdZViewItem

    That will take you to around 37Bhp.

    Then think about getting rid of all the ice you have installed, that will take out about 3 ton from your kerb weight (Power to weigh ratio an all dat).

    Then get rid of you ****3r lights (Little blue neonís on the washer jets of your bonnet) & all that neon cr4p from around your car, that will stop you robbing your ECU of the much needed power from the batteries.

    Next is to gut the interior of your car again that will save kerb weight.

    Are you very very fat?? If so then go on a diet that will also save on the kerb weight, not to mention your drive shafts & shocks/springs, lower arms & bushes.

    Donít bother with ballast (Chav bird AKA girlfriend or that slapper you picked up from the street corner) so will only act as ballast (Hence the name) which again is kerb weight.

    Also get rid of that cheap cr4p fibreglass bodykit & ironing board you have installed, this will create drag killing your top end & acceleration.

    Failing that call out the RAC or AA, if they tow you that will be the most BHP/speed your car could ever reach & you donít have to pay for petrol BONUS hay!!

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    Mav's Avatar
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    Grab your moms Ironing board and fibreglass it to your roof mate, I heard that adds a good 100 bcp (break chav power)
    Mk 4 Linea Rossa Coupe Turbo

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    tony sri's Avatar
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    i would try walking

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